Why are both of these "mottos" promoted? They seem very contradictory.
Last spring, I had a 10 page research proposal due for a Sociology 101 class. I really hated the class, and thought it was ridiculous that a 101 class required such an assignment. I wrestled every day to get myself reading journal articles and writing pages of research proposing. I eventually started even having panic attacks (ADD-induced) because I couldn't focus on what I needed to do, and wasn't getting anything done. I would spend an hour researching and an hour watching Samurai Jack or Dragonball, just so I could distract myself from the stress I was incurring. I finally made it to 8 pages and was beginning to lose all hope. People started to tell me that I should just move on, and let it go. I said I didn't want to give up, but for some reason people were adamant that there was a difference between giving up and moving on.
In the bible, God's love is described as enduring, steadfast, and persevering through the eternity of trials which we go through. We are promised that he will finish the good work he starts in us. God never gives up on us.
Yet some Christians would say that God lets us go. The Pentecostals whom I am surrounded by all believe that God gives us free will so that we can choose what we want (sin or salvation), implying that God will let us go ("because he loves us so much") should we stumble and fall.
When I was dating my first girlfriend, things got kinda rough because I didn't know what I was doing, and she expected a lot more out of me than I did of her. She would compare our relationship to a mortally wounded pet on the side of a road, saying that we needed to let go.
But yet, the whole idea of marriage is a promise to commitment, a vow to persevere, "till death do you part".
"Shoot for the moon, because even if you miss you're still among the stars". This was my friend, Belinda's inspirational quote. Belinda was the first person in 10 years to be accepted to Harvard from Yakima (where I went to high school). She was a national merit scholar, had 4.0 GPA, all 5's on every AP test she took (and she took a lot of them!), and performed at state Piano contests. She was an exceptionally dedicated individual, who would not give up on her education, and is seeing it through to the end.
When applying for jobs, the hiring process can be super competitive. One of the biggest things I've learned recently is to not be afraid to be annoying. I never get called back if I just wait for them to call me, but I'm learning that I stand a much better chance if I take initiative and keep going, persevering.
Death Cab for Cutie has a song titled "I Will Possess Your Heart. This song is a MAJOR example of the conflict between "Never Give Up" and "Just Move On". The song starts with a 4.5 minute intro, driven by a simple, persistent bass line which stays the same throughout. As the intro progresses, more instruments are slowly added, developing the progression into a progressively more complicated experience. The music builds to a climax, at which point Ben Gibbard's voice cuts the build up with the line "How I wish you could see the potential The potential of you and me. It's like a book elegantly bound but in a language you can't read just yet.". The long, wordless build up and anticipation perfectly represent a building of romantic infatuation. The bass line is committed to the whole 8 minute song, telling of a person's desperate attempt to win the love of another. "you reject my advances and desperate pleas. I won't let you let me down so easily". "You Gotta spend some time, love, you gotta spend some time with me, and I know that you'll find, love, I will possess your heart.". Responses to this song are really intriguing to me. Some feel sympathy for the speaker, admiring their persistence and affection for the person. However, most people find the song creepy and wearisome. "The intro is too long!" and "He's such a creeper!" are common comments on the song.
So do we, culturally, value persistence and dedication to never give up? Or is there a time when we need to just let go and move on?
What is the correct approach to persistence and dedication? How do we know when it is time to move on? What is the difference between "letting go", and "giving up"?
I do not understand this.
"Listen to God" is not an acceptable response, because to one person God lets us go to choose sin or salvation, and to another God ensures salvation. Both claim to resemble perfect love.
Comments (3)
i dont know if its the society we are in or i am in. or its just laziness or my lack of self confidence, but i was wondering about keep preserving or just giving up as well. sometimes its very hard to decide because its all in how you look at it.
im currently in the job market as well and it gets depressing when you dont get a call back. sometmes i think they accept applications just to have a pool of them. perhaps its just about going out and doing it.. i gotta get the hustling character lolfor relationships, ive seen some where it would be wise to give up because there is not interest in the other party but others they want to see a strong interest haha.. such a confusing world we live in.
anyways, some days i feel like we just keep doing what we do in hopes that it will end up somewhere and for those who feel/know what they want they are heading in that direction.. haha if that at all made sense =]
I think we are caught in the tides of "Never give up" and "just move on" as it relates to the current job market.
I wish I had a better answer, but I think we're in the same boat. I think it depends on what you're giving up or not giving up on. I believe that some things are worth giving up because they're not going to go anywhere. But you don't always know that. If you don't know or not if you'll be successful in one specific thing, and there's no way to know, don't give up. But, like in that first relationship, if the end is in sight and things are not getting better no matter what you do, I think it's okay to move on. It sounds better than being miserable. Is there a difference between giving up and moving on? I think yes. I think it's all in the attitude. If it's because "I don't want to try anymore because it's too hard and giving up is easy," then that's giving up. If it's because "This situation is going to really hurt me if I don't get out, and it really would be better for my well-being if I quit," then that's moving on. It's different for everyone and for every situation, so I don't think it's just in black and white, always one way or always the other way.